another friend, in another conversation told me that I’m bored “and you’re creating interest in your life.”
Now (without trivializing the very real struggles of a physical addiction) I am wondering if I am an addict. I am addicted to drama, to excitement, to confusion and a feeling of losing control. I process this more functionally than I did, in my younger years, but it’s still there.
after striving to create a sense of normalcy in the turbulence of my days I still seek out and encourage an unnecessary level of madness.
maybe if I get some new poses that will be enough of a struggle to get me to tone it down.
but maybe I just need to grow up.